Let me introduce myself, Bongiorno!!! Mi chiamo Bella Sophia Ocasio-Dávila. As you all can deduct from my name… I am “Cento
per Cento Italiana” (one hundred percent Italian); to be more specific
“Napolitana”- in other words, in English Neapolitan…yes like the Ice cream! I
have a “Vanilla” body (white), “Chocolate” head (brown) and a “Strawberry”
tummy (pink). My PAPÁ calls me “il mio piccolo gelato”
(my little ice cream). Well in reality,
I am a Puerto Rican beauty, a Goddess, a Diva, a future Miss Universe! A talented modern wonder… that would be a
virtuoso musician, a grand piano or violin master but…. I have no thumbs, so I can
only delight you with my soprano voice! La! La! La!... La!!!!!! Woof…. Ups!!!
I am the Blog administrator for my PAPÁ and now,
I shall take command; it is time for a new adventure (related by me or in
French “Moi”) to grace the pages of this blog.
I promise to be entertaining, dramatic, epic and caring…. And the story
starts like this!!! Silence on the
FLOOR>>>> Action!
It
has been almost two years since that dreadful day! Dramatic…do you like it, do you like it?????
The day I learned by first experience the meaning of shock, pain, anger,
depression, change, reconstruction, hope and acceptance! Step back Oliver
Stone! It is Bella’s time!
Now we dim the lights, we start the Diva fan, a dramatic
drum roll and a spotlight on… MEEEEEEE!!!!! Credits rolling……..now the sound track……
Maestro please!
Chapter 1: SHOCK & DENIAL- You will probably react to learning
of the loss with numbed disbelief. You may deny the reality of the loss on some
level, in order to avoid the pain. Shock provides emotional protection from
being overwhelmed all at once. This may last for weeks.
I can remember it like it was yesterday…… I was taking nap number 12, I had just moved on
the love seat from my Neiman Marcus pillow to the Sacs Fifth Avenue silk throw
(well whatever is PAPÁ’S, is mine.) The
ceiling fan breeze was tickling my tummy and NPR (national Public Radio) was
delighting me with the morning Classical Musical extravaganza Show, Suddenly… I
heard that a car had just parked in front of the house! It was not just any
car……It was my PAPÁ! Well he wants me to call him my Roommate……. I swiftly retrieve to my lookout post and
yes!!!!! It was PAPÁ, he was home early … he was back…….. Maybe he was coming
to get me to take me shopping…..maybe to the theater… (I hear “La Traviata” is
in town) Maybe…. Maybe…. Yes…Maybe he was going to take me to Paris!!!!!!!
Maybe it was BELLA’S Day and I was able to pick anything I wanted…… Maybe,
Maybe, Maybe he is organizing my favorite magazines and catalogues in
alphabetical order…Vogue, Mari Clare, Versace, Prada… ok in the pretty order!!!!
I maintained my post on the highest peak of the
sofa and nothing… I re-adjusted my lace front wig and…nothing… It has been 20 minutes since he arrived and
he has not come out of the car….. Let me get a little bit higher…. Yep he is
still in the car… Maybe he is listening to NPR.
Oh yeah, here he comes, let me organize the sofa so he will never notice
I was taking a nap on it…. Time to return to my stinky bed….let’s believe I was
here all day like a good girl... Oops, let’s not forget to smile, he loves my
ugly teeth. Papa will be getting me
braces soon, the ones with orange, blue, red, and pink rubber bands.
·
I can hear his footsteps on the wood deck, ok,
ok, ok, ok…
·
The giggling of the keys, ok… ok, ok, ok, ok…
·
Giggle, giggle, giggle, wait a moment! That’s
not the keys…that’s me! MMMMM I sound so nice… I love this new collar, it has
my name in rhinestones and it makes…. Back to the story, back to the story…
·
Ok don’t move, don’t breath and yes the door is
opening
·
I can hear the movement of the……and……….
What…..no door opening…….
·
What now! Come on I have to pee!!!!
·
Let’s go and see what is happening.
OHHH PAPÁ,you’re in the house (I think my
thoughts were louder than the sound of the door….. I need to tone down my
thoughts and the stories going through my head they are louder than reality.
My roommate seems strange and distant! He opened
the door so I could visit the” Au natural” poop room. He cleaned my beautiful paws and derriere (with
a wet towel) and took me with him to his bed………….
·
WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
·
Me… on his bed?????
·
What’s happening, what’s wrong??????????
·
It’s the End of the World …but its not December
20, 2012
·
I am Scared!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mmmmmmm Nice soft pillow….MMMMMM. I don’t know what’s happening, but something isn’t right! …I’m on the bed!!!!
Could you please rub my tummy… Yeahhhhh. PAPA, rubbed my tummy and went to sleep. He looks sad….I am on the BED!!! Bravo!!!
Yeahhhhhhh sad!!!!! MMMMMChapter 2. PAIN & GUILT- As the shock wears off, it is replaced with the suffering of unbelievable pain. Although excruciating and almost unbearable, it is important that you experience the pain fully, and not hide it, avoid it or escape from it; life feels chaotic and scary during this phase.
I don’t know what is happening? Papa has not gone to work, the conversations
of modeling school have subsided and he threw away the magazines with the braces
with the pretty colored rubber bands…Ten days later it was the same routine
wake up in the morning around 11:00 AM,
go outside for my morning Beauty routine. Call Mama and Papa in Puerto Rico, Call Titi
Vivian in Plant City, turn on the TV and go back to sleep. We have turned into night creatures, we were
awake all night, taking midnight strolls and watching TV until Around 5 A.M. We would fall asleep and then we will do it all
over again. After 3 weeks we incorporated Computer Skills. Facebook became our
friend and I learned how to job hunt.
Still not understanding why my roommate did not leave the house and why
he was not the funny guy I love, I decided to become his personal secretary and
shadow. I took an oath not to leave his
side and help him with his computer duties, which I monitored from the bed with
my eyes closed. Don’t be hating me!… it’s
how I meditate and take care of things… Baby, this is how I roll!!
·
If my roommate took a shower, there I was
standing at the edge of the tub
·
If he went to the kitchen, I was there
·
If he sat on the floor…it was me!!! On his lap
·
If he got on all fours to look under the bed, I
squeezed under him to check out what he is doing.
·
If he slept, I would be vigilant on my blanket
by his side.
·
I even created a reconnaissance plan and
implemented the techniques learned in “Gold Finger,” a James Bond move called
“jump and peak”… yes I would start on the right side of the bed with a
reindeer/rabbit technique hopping and taking a glimpse of my roommate on the
bed and end up at the other side of the bed and then I returned to my starting
point... and then over and over again.
·
And I never abandoned my duties of safeguarding
the premises of our castle. Our manor is
“Tudor” style….but we just use the back door!!! One less door for me to guard.
Treats became the rule of the house, as much as
for me as for him….Come on, Big Boy hit
me with a cookie….. Si, Si, Si….. How about
a bacon bite?… Ja, Ja, Ja…. Give me beef jerky… Oui, Oui, Oui…. PAPA spends
most of his time in the bed or at the computer and he had snacks at both
locations… and they were all for ME!!!!
I barely can keep my eyes open, its 4 AM and
PAPA is baking in the kitchen….. sniff, sniff, sniff… It smells like MMMM, My
favorite cookies……PAPA bakes the best things when he is sad…… Cookie, Cookie, Cookie…Poor
PAPA…sad…….Cookies!!!!!
Chapter 3. ANGER & BARGAINING- Frustration gives way to anger,
and you may lash out and lay unwarranted. Please try to control this, as
permanent damage to your relationships may result. This is a time for the
release of bottled up emotion. You may rail against fate, questioning "Why
me?" You may also try to bargain in vain with the powers that be for a way
out of your despair.
I can see my room… (I let PAPA and other guests
use my room, but it is still mine) PAPÁ,
filing papers and papers and papers and tap, tap, tap on the computer deciding
what bills to pay that day. I am in
charge of the filing system. I would take a pretty paper from the left side of
the room and take it to the right side of the room, then I will take a paper
from the right side of the room and take it to the left side of the room. This action did not make much of a difference
but Papa would give me one or two cookies that he had baked for me and if I
would lie on my back and show him my “Uggy” teeth he would give me a third
cookie. Papa was mad at somebody or
something; he walked from side to side in the house waving his hands in the air
like a mad man and I followed him side to side in the house waiving my tiny
tail and squeaking my toy monkey with my “uggy” teeth! I made him laugh, he would pick me up hug me
and take me to my fabulous store… “Home Depot” he would place me in the cart
and we would go up and down every…aisle… saying hello to the shoppers as well
as the store attendants. I like Mr. Mary
Elisabeth he always comes to pet me. He
is very smart, he knows everything about plumbing … Yes I love it!
As soon as we returned home it started all over
again; pacing from one side of the house to the other with the talking box on
his ear. Papa would continue saying …If
I do this…Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah… then this will happen. I need to pay, Chop, Chop, Chop, Chop, Chop,
Chop... Oops... sorry I have a new bone… back to the story… I need to pay the
house, and I have a thousand other bills, I am sure Darth Vader or the witch
doesn’t have these problems. Why is PAPA
talking about my squeaky toys or Halloween ???? MMMM good idea, let me look for
the witch…time to play! OK… Halloween has
just past and PAPA continues talking about that darn Witch…. I don’t understand. Shouldn’t he be focusing on turkeys????
Thanksgiving is next in line!Chapter 4. "DEPRESSION", REFLECTION, LONELINESS- Just when your friends may think you should be getting on with your life, a long period of sad reflection will likely overtake you. This is a normal stage of grief, so do not be "talked out of it" by well-meaning outsiders. Encouragement from others is not helpful to you during this stage of grieving.
During this time, you finally realize the true magnitude of your loss, and it depresses you. You may isolate yourself on purpose, reflect on things you did with your lost one, and focus on memories of the past. You may sense feelings of emptiness or despair.
Its 7:00 o’clock in the morning, time to go to the al fresco room…. What’s that? My carriage, my traveling bag… my jet setter, Caribbean beach transport apparatus… yes, we are going home to see PAPA and MAMA….. Well, yes, this is the real PAPÁ and MAMA! It’s time to get ready for to face the world “mon, mon, mon, amour” Ms. Bella needs to get beautiful for her fans.
While I was brushing my hair into a high
hairdo…something like the late Ms. Amy Winehouse…I noticed that my roomy was on
a phone call. I believe it is with PAPA. He is not smiling or being crazy, he
has not tossed me in the air or tickled my tummy, he just picks me up gives me
little kisses on the head …uchhhhhh he needs to stop!!! Just toss my monkey or
my ball. Enough of the hugs and kisses,
get a life!!!!! Snap out of it …Get a JOB!!! OOps…. Sherlock, I think I know
what is happening! If I crawl, take a couple of back flips and rappel down the
sofa I will be able to intersect the communica…… ok, he is next to me! I will
unravel the mystery of the man that has not left home for the past 95 Lunches
and dinners, 175 snousages and thousands of hugs and kisses….no, I don’t have a
calendar and I don’t know how to use one…so add it up!
Ok let me listen in…aha, aha, aha I think he
said that Witch or ditch…aha, aha, aha … "Sufferin' succotash!" “HE LOST HIS JOB”….. noooo!!! My braces, my dance
classes, my couture, my travel! Wait,
PAPA sent him tickets to go to Puerto Rico… let’s move it PAPi, snap out of it…
we are going to San Juan!!! He is so
sad……Let’s go!!!!! Yeahhhhhhhhhhh.
I cannot wait to arrive in San Juan…that’s where
PAPA and MAMA live; they are originally from a town called Corozal. Corozal is a town nestled in the center of
the island. Corozal is known as "La
Cuna del Volibol" (Volleyball birthplace). Corozal was founded in 1795 by Joaquin Marrero
and José de Rivera Ortiz, and officially became a town in 1804. MAMA comes from the “Marrero Family”. I love
to say her name out loud, “Maria Teresa
Francisca Dávila Fuentez Marrero Rivera…….Noa, Igarabidez” . I think I am going to change my name to be
just like hers!!!!! The city name is
derived from the "palma de corozo" (grugru palm, Acrocomia media)
which abounds in the central zone of the Island. Corozal is located in the central-eastern
region, north of Orocovis
and Barranquitas;
south Vega Alta;
southwest of Toa Alta;
east of Morovis
and Orocovis; and west of Naranjito.
Major rivers include:
Manatí, Cibuco, De los Negros, Corozal and Grande de Manatí.
Corozal is home to the Historical Center of
Cibuco, a park and museum with relics from the Puertorican natives (tainos) as
well as objects, paintings and artifacts from the town's history. Corozal's local Taino Indian Cacique (Chief)
was named Orocobix and his tribe was known as the Jatibonicu Taino. PAPA has a Taino name for me, and I love when
he calls me by my native name… are you ready? Are you ready for it? “MIRATONA”,
isn’t it beautiful? The Native Americans translation is “MYRAT”; it even sounds
beautiful in the Native American tongue!Chapter 5. THE UPWARD TURN- As you start to adjust to life, your life becomes a little calmer and more organized. Your physical symptoms lessen, and your "depression" begins to lift slightly.
We have had 25 meals in Puerto Rico and my roommate spends the days dressing up in that soft material coat that it is so nice to take a nap on, and a funny leash he places around his neck. Father Ricky, or as I call him, “hey throw the ball Ricky”, takes him to a place they call interviews. I guess it’s a supermarket because they always bring me cookies. I heard MAMA say that it has been almost four months since my roommate lost his job… this makes me sad!!!! Is that a cookie….yeahhhhhh Bella Happy!!! I mean Bella sad.
Today we are going to a place called Guavate…
and yes I am going!! And Mama, PAPA, and my roommate ...”papa” and Ms. Rosa, I like Ms. Rosa.
The road up is winding and crowded “I think I’m
going to P….” The road ends at the Carite Forest Reserve. There are vendors
along the roadside selling all sorts of things like plants, honey, seasonings
and Puerto Rican souvenirs.
We have been to Guavate a few times. It is a
tasty and interesting place. The live music gets people dancing and singing,
and everyone is eating and drinking. The area is really like a multi-mile long
block party. Children play in the streams and forests behind the restaurants.
Older people hang out and talk, eat and dance. Young adults just drive up and
down this congested area, just scoping out, looking for people they know. It’s
a place to be seen. I still don’t
know what a roasted pig is, or as it’s called in Spanish, “Lechón” because PAPA
always covers my eyes when we get close to it…I guess it should be like a sort
of Figgie Pudding, like in the movies….yeah…
Families make the trip in droves, not just for
the lechón, but also for the various side dishes like rice and pigeon
peas, “I hate Pigeons” they go into my back yard and poop all over my
deck…..sorry! The story…the story…the
story… and back! Cassava, breadfruit, sweet potato, blood sausage, and yellow
or green plantains. Of course, besides the delicious pork, there are turkeys
and chickens cooked and seasoned in a similar way. Those are really good, too!
And not only is the food a draw, but also the live music and the cool mountain
air. It is a daytime activity – most people leave before sundown.
Weekends in Puerto Rico are a family affair,
especially Sundays. Locals love to get together for meals and family
activities. Places that offer cooler temperatures, great food and live music
are always popular with locals looking for some fun. If you, as a tourist, want
to experience some of that fun and flavor, you can join them and head to the
famous lechoneras in Guavate. Oh no! There is a dead animal in that
restaurant….NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
PÁPA
spends time talking to ….nobody; he is talking to the mirror… he calls it
interviewing….I think he is going cuckoo!!!
It is nice to know that I have a break from all this interviewing. I need a good night sleep! By the way I still don’t know what
interviewing means….Chapter 6. RECONSTRUCTION & WORKING THROUGH- As you become more functional, your mind starts working again, and you will find yourself seeking realistic solutions to problems posed by life. You will start to work on practical and financial problems and reconstructing yourself and your life.
Taking
care of PAPA is very exhausting; it’s 3 am and I guess he needs to go
potty. He keeps on waking me up, at
these unruly hours to go walking up and down the streets and he never finds the
right bush to go potty….surely it’s not because of me, I’m sleepy and I am a
big girl and I can hold to the morning…..
·
A CAT!!!!!
Urrrrrr!!!!!!
Thank GOD he carries me, mmmmm…
I cannot respond to these actions this late at night…
Act like a Lady, act like a Lady…Act like a Lady…
Now, I can go back to sleep….
PAPA
spends time on the Phone with Titi Vivian, they practice asking each other
questions for that stuff called an interview;
They bore me!!!! Let me jump off the bed and dance like a ballerina or
maybe I will bring Ms. Cow so I can entertain him.
No
PAPA!!!!! Don’t remove my hair from your jacket! It was so nicely positioned and it added a
touch of distinction; like the sashes utilized by the kings in old times. PAPA is leaving for his interview and I am
hoping for the best!!!!
Chapter 7. ACCEPTANCE & HOPE- During this, the last of the seven stages in this grief model, you learn to accept and deal with the reality of your situation. Acceptance does not necessarily mean instant happiness. Given the pain and turmoil you have experienced, you can never return to the carefree, untroubled YOU that existed before this tragedy. But you will find a way forward.
What is this? PAPA brought me new Magazines with pretty colored rubber band braces, and the latest Vogue and Elle magazines…..this is fascinating, fascinating, fascinating……. Wait a moment…that’s what I need in order to celebrate PAPAS new job… my little head is so confused… YES!!! PAPA has a new job with the ….Cuty, Cutie, Coty….no, no, no, no, no, no, !!!!! The County…. Yes we are back in business, isn’t it fascinating?!….. That reminds me that I need a “Fascinator” like the one Princess Beatrice wore at the royal wedding of Prince William and Catherine Middleton. Various female guests arrived to the wedding wearing fascinators. Among them was Princess Beatrice of York,… “LOVE HER, LOVE HER, LOVE HER, LOVE HER, LOVE HER, !!!” She wore a piece designed by the Irish milliner Philip Treacy “MY IDOL” (I have 20 of his master pieces…well the pictures in a magazine) the unusual shape and colour caused quite a media stir and went on to become an internet phenomenon with its own Facebook page. I think that the same thing will happen to me….. Yes, Facebook will explode with requests of viewers wanting to see my beautiful fascinator. My fascinator will be of substantial size and bulk, bigger than a barrette, it will be a modern fascinator, made with feathers, flowers, beads and ribbons. It will be attached via headband, because I have a tiny little head and I will need to balance it….. Princess Beatrice used the publicity to auction it off on eBay, where it garnered 99,000 Euros for charity. The auction of My Fascinator will triple that amount!!!! We are like sisters…. Sorry!!! I can’t deal with this little head of mine, so many thoughts, so many things to do….. No! No! No! I digress…back to PÁPA.
We wave survived seven months of trial, seven
months of minimal income, seven months in front of a computer, seven months of
late nights, seven months of unwarranted stress, seven months of insecurities,
seven months of reassurance, love, support from your family and friends, seven
months of anger, seven months of indecision, seven months of change, seven
months of re-organization, seven months of discovery, seven months of “proof of
who are your real friends”, seven months of enlightenment, seven months of
confusion, seven months of testimony that your family will be there through
thick and thin, seven months of unconditional love, seven months of grief,
seven months of kindness of those that love you, seven months of picking up the
parts of a puzzle that we call life, seven months to get ready to put that
puzzle back together again, SEVEN MONTHS OF CHANGE……
As they say, what does not break you, makes you
stronger. And stronger we are!!!
And you thought Rat terriers were not
eloquent!!!
Love
Miss Bella Sophia
DOG Cookies (Bella’s every day
cookies)
Ingredients
- 2
1/2 cups whole wheat flour
- 3/4
cup nonfat dry milk powder
- 1
egg, beaten
- 1/2
cup vegetable oil
- 2
cubes beef bouillon cube
- 3/4
cup boiling water
- 2
tablespoons brown
sugar
Directions
1. Preheat oven to 300
degrees F (150 degrees C). Lightly grease one cookie sheet.
2. Dissolve bouillon
cubes in boiling water and allow cooling.
3. Combine the flour,
dry milk, egg, oil, beef broth and brown sugar. Mix well and knead dough for 1
minute.
4. On a floured surface
roll out dough to about 1/4 inch thickness. Cut out bones and place on cookie
sheet.
5. Bake for 30 minutes
and allow cooling.
DOG Cookies number II (Bella’s
healthy cookies)
Ingredients
- 2
cups wheat germ
- 3
(2.5 ounce) jars strained chicken baby food
- 1
tablespoon water
Directions
1. Preheat oven to 350
degrees F (175 degrees C).
2. In a medium bowl, mix
the wheat germ, baby food, and water together. Add more water if necessary to
form a dough. Roll dough into 1 inch balls and place on cookie sheet. Flatten
slightly with a fork dipped in water. Bake for 20 to 25 minutes in the preheated
oven.
DOG Cookies III (Bella’s party
Cookies)
You
can feel good letting your dog indulge in these carob peanut butter dog treats
since carob has many health benefits. Carob is low in fat and sodium, and high
in fiber, potassium, and calcium. Not only that, it can improve digestion.
Ingredients:
·
3/4 cup rolled oats
·
2 cups whole wheat flour
·
4 tsp carob powder (see tip)
·
1 cup natural peanut butter
·
1 cup milk, low or fat free
·
1/4 cup carob chips (see tip)
Instructions:
1.
Preheat oven to 350° F
2.
In a large bowl, whisk together the oats, flour, and carob powder.
3.
In a microwave safe bowl, warm the peanut butter for approximately
30 seconds.
4.
In a small bowl, whisk the warmed peanut butter and milk together
with a fork until thoroughly combined.
5.
Make a well in the dry ingredients and pour in the peanut butter
mixture.
6.
With a wooden spoon, stir until combined. The dough will be very
thick.
7.
Fold in the carob chips.
8.
Place a sheet of parchment paper on a baking sheet.
9.
Using
a 1 inch cookie scooper, pack the fudge-like dog cookie dough into the scooper with your hands.
10.
Release the ball and once on the baking sheet, flatten to a cookie
shape.
11.
Bake for 15 minutes. Cool completely on a wire rack. Or, leave in
the oven, once turned off, to cool and harden for 2 hours.
Storing - Keep these carob dog treats in the refrigerator
for up to 2 weeks. Freeze and use before the end of 6 months. For more tips on how to store homemade dog treats be sure to read our list of reminders and techniques.
Yield - This carob recipe for gourmet dog cookies will make a nice batch
of approximately 42 cookies, or 3 1/2 dozen, using a 1 inch cookie scooper.
How to store you Dog treats
Things to Consider:
·
Where you live -Is it hot
and humid, cold and dry or a combination of these? Homemade dog biscuits that
are left in a dog treat jar on the counter will last a lot longer in a cool and
dry environment than one that is hot and humid.
·
Preservatives - Even
though store bought dog treats may last longer because of their preservatives,
one reason we bake our own is because of all those undesirable additives,
including the preservatives.
But not all preservatives are bad. You can bake
with natural preservatives such as vitamin C and E. You can also use citric
acid (like those found in citrus fruits) and rosemary.· Ingredients - The type and amount of certain ingredients plays a part in how you store homemade dog treats. If you have baked dog cookies with butter or oil, they will not last as long as ones made with margarine. Also, treats made with meat and/or meat juices, will need to be refrigerated and will not last as long as other treats.
· Moisture - The moisture, texture and denseness of your dog treats also plays a part. A crunchy or hard treat will last weeks longer than soft dog training treats or moist dog cupcakes.
· Cool - No, we're not saying you're cool for baking homemade dog treats (even though you are!). We're talking about temperature. Before storing homemade dog treats, you need to be sure that your treats are completely cooled. If you don't you could end up with a moldy dog treat jar, because of condensation, definitely not good dog eats.
· Light - You and your dog treats have an enemy, it's light. Well, really, direct bright sunlight and heat are your enemies. The best place to store homemade dog treats is in a cool, dark and dry place.
If you consider these few things when it comes time to store
homemade dog treats, your dog will be enjoying your baking efforts for many
weeks!
